- Where Every Game Matters*!
For those who haven’t noticed, this evening we were met with the first sign of the holiday season. No, not snowfall on the ground, or holiday cups at Starbucks! The American Institution that is the ESPN COLLEGE FOOTBALL BOWL CHAMPIONSHIP SERIES COUNTDOWN SELECTION SHOW PRESENTED BY ALLSTATE INSURANCE! For those who were too busy to watch, here’s a recap:
I’m not sure if you remember, but this off-season the big talk in the world of college athletics was conference expansion. Among many things deemed essential by the NCAA (increased revenue), the big hoopla was that it would find out who truly was the “champion” of each conference and allow better match-ups in the BCS. Well, it turns out that out of all the conference championship games played this past weekend, none of them affected the national title game!
In fact, by virtue of sitting on their bottoms and playing video games this past week, the Alabama Crimson Tide will be getting their much deserved rematch against LSU in the BCS title game! But that’s not all folks! Look at the other match-ups we are being treated to this bowl season:
Gildan New Mexico Bowl
Wyoming vs. Temple
A bowl game so boring, even New Mexico didn’t feel motivated enough to win 5 more games and make it.
Famous Idaho Potato Bowl
Ohio vs. Utah State
For being such a famous bowl game, you’d think they could get better teams than the runner-up in the MAC and a team that couldn’t even win the WAC.
R+L Carriers New Orleans Bowl
San Diego State vs. Louisiana-Lafayette
ULL’s QB tied Jake Delhomme’s school record for TDs in a season (20). Interpret that as you will.
Beef ‘O’ Brady’s St. Petersburg Bowl
Florida International vs. Marshall
The Golden Panthers tied pre-season contender Florida State for most wins by a team from Florida this year. If only this bowl could have gotten the other match-up. Florida State plays against the Fighting Irish while FIU plays in a bowl sponsored by an Irish themed restaurant that serves tacos.
San Diego County Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl
TCU vs. Louisiana Tech
With the loss of Andy Dalton to the NFL, TCU was able to tackle such opposition as Portland State and New Mexico on it’s way to a bowl game against WAC champion Louisiana Tech. Can the Horned Frogs sustain the momentum?
MAACO Las Vegas Bowl
Arizona State vs. Boise State
The Broncos look to increase their case for national relevance by beating a 6-6 ASU team that fired it’s coach and was unable to best 6-7 UCLA for the Pac-12 South Division title.
Sheraton Hawaii Bowl
Nevada vs. Southern Miss
Am I the only one who wonders why they don’t put a period at the end of “Miss”? I don’t know, I just get an image of a southern debutante whenever I hear their name.
AdvoCare V100 Independence Bowl
Missouri vs. North Carolina
Missouri is headed to the SEC this season and given their record this year, this bowl might be their last shot at winning a game in a very, very long time. North Carolina won the bowl bid for this game after Miami graciously turned down the bowl game this year out of the kindness of their heart. The lack of bowl revenue should put a large enough dent in Miami’s abortions and strippers budget to prompt the NCAA to lessen the punishment at their hearing.
Little Caesars Bowl
Western Michigan vs. Purdue Boilermakers
The Western Michigan Broncos earned one win this season against an opponent from an Automatic-Qualifying conference in their victory over UConn which prompted many around the country to take note and wonder, “Why does the Big East get an automatic BCS bid?”
Louisville vs. NC State
NC State was able to make a bowl game despite losing quarterback Russell Wilson to Wisconsin this summer. Because if you don’t like Raleigh, NC, the only logical place to move to is Madison Wisconsin.
Military Bowl Presented by Northrop Grumman
Toledo vs. Air Force
You can talk all you want about the military wasting money on fighter jets and other items, but how much longer are we going to tolerate funding football teams from Army, Air Force, and Navy? When will the madness end?
Bridgepoint Education Holiday Bowl
Cal vs. Texas
With the Niners, Raiders, and Stanford all playing well this year, the Cal Bears have found themselves as the worst football team in the San Francisco Bay Area, a feat that is much more difficult than you think it would be.
Champs Sports Bowl
Florida State vs. Notre Dame
Lou Holtz has already declared the winner of this game to be the national champion.
Valero Alamo Bowl
Washington vs. Baylor
Heisman hopeful Robert Griffin III looks to lead the upstart Bears into a match-up against a team that declares a 7-5 season after a 6-6 season to be progress.
Bell Helicopter Armed Forces Bowl
BYU vs. Tulsa
Not to be confused with the Military Bowl, a team coached by a man named Bronco will try to defeat a team from the middle of Oklahoma nicknamed the Hurricanes.
New Era Pinstripe Bowl
Rutgers vs Iowa St.
Rutgers couldn’t even beat UConn to clinch the Big East title, Iowa State edged out Northern Iowa by 1 point to start the season. You’re telling me an organization that seemingly paid CC Sabathia 1 million dollars per pinstripe chose these two teams? Actually, that sounds about right.
Franklin American Mortgage Music CIty Bowl
Mississippi State vs. Wake Forest
“Yes MSU might be a 6-6 team, but they went 6-6 in the SEC! That’s worth at least 23-0 in the Big Ten!”
Iowa vs. Oklahoma
The University of Oklahoma prefers to go by OU and still employs Bob Stoops. If you were in charge at Oklahoma which problem would you solve first.
Meineke Car Care Bowl of Texas
Texas A&M vs. Northwestern
Not to be confused with that OTHER Meineke Car Care Bowl. That one might be worth watching…
Hyundai Sun Bowl
Georgia Tech vs Utah
Utah ranks 110th in the country in the offense and is no way touching the Pacific Ocean making many wonder why they heck they were added to the Pac-12.
AutoZone Liberty Bowl
Cincinnati vs Vanderbilt
Cincinnati started 7-1 and ended 9-3. Ladies and Gentlemen, your Big East Co-Champions!
Virginia vs. Auburn
One year after a perfect season, the Auburn Tigers attempt to win a game named after a sandwich consisting of fried chicken and a pickle.
Kraft Fight Hunger Bowl
Illinois vs UCLA
Illinois started 6-0 and finished 6-6. UCLA is heading to a bowl game with a losing record, yet won their division in the Pac-12. I’ve got a feeling we’ll be fighting boredom.
Houston vs. Penn State
This match-up of a near BCS-buster and the proud Penn State alums will do wonders for the economy of TicketCity. Wait, TicketCity isn’t a real place? Why do they get a bowl game?
Michigan St vs Georgia
Last year Michigan St rode a 10 win season into a 49-7 beat down at the hands of Alabama. Following another 10-win season, Michigan St is in prime position to get blown out again.
Capital One Bowl
Nebraska vs. South Carolina
The consensus pre-season favorite to win the Big 10 and end world hunger finds itself in the highlight game of Capital One Bowl week against a team whose nickname is consistently chosen as the favorite of 10 year old boys everywhere.
Taxslayer.com Gator Bowl
The Ohio State vs. Florida
Ohio State plays Florida in a game that most commentators on ESPN will fail to realize will be coached by Luke Fickell, not Urban Meyer. But hey, in a 24 hour news cycle, you have to find something to talk about. Also, Taxslayer.com? How nerdy can accountants get?
Rose Bowl Game Presented by Vizio
Wisconsin vs. Oregon
In his last game of his long and storied tenure at Wisconsin, Russell Wilson leads the Badgers into a match-up against a school that continues to forget their own school colors.
Tositos Fiesta Bowl
Stanford vs Oklahoma St
Oklahoma St will look to avoid a let down after winning their conference title and being looked over for a team that didn’t even play in their conference championship game. Stanford is led by a quarterback most pick to be number 1 overall come the NFL draft due to dominance over local rivals Cal and San Jose State. This one’s for all the Tostitos.
Allstate Sugar Bowl
Michigan vs. Virginia Tech
It might surprise many people to see Michigan in a BCS game instead of the Michigan State team that beat them earlier in the season, and played in the Big 10 championship game. But then again, if Michigan wins this game against Virginia Tech (a team that is coming off a blowout loss in the ACC Championship Game) and Michigan St loses their match-up against Georgia, the BCS will look like geniuses for setting up this match-up. Meanwhile, Kansas St and their number 8 ranking are left out.
Discover Orange Bowl
West Virginia vs Clemson
I can already see the commercial for the ESPN 30 for 30 about this game:
“One of them won the Big East, one of the teams won the ACC. What if I told you that the number 15 team and number 23 teams played each other in a BCS game? The Toilet Bowl, Directed by Joe Smith, Presented by ESPN Films 30 for 30.”
AT&T Cotton Bowl
Kansas St vs. Arkansas
This actually should be a great game. It’s only a shame we couldn’t find somewhere to put the number 6 and 8 teams in the country in the BCS line-up. Oh well…
BBVA Compass Bowl
SMU vs Pittsburgh
This will be the second year in a row for Pitt in the BBVA Compass bowl, possibly leading to Pitt fans to find out what BBVA Compass actually is.
Arkansas St. vs. Northern Illinois
I know on paper this may seem like a boring match-up but I hear that they have unrated material from the game online that’s supposed to be cuh-razy.
Allstate BCS National Championship Game
Alabama vs. LSU
If Alabama was to hypothetically beat LSU 9-6, who would you crown the national champion? Fun fact: Alabama will have 45 days between it’s last game (an Iron Bowl win against Auburn) and the BCS title game. Or as it’s more commonly known, one Kardashian marriage.
Seems like we’re in for a treat. Stay tuned for my completely biased and baseless picks to be posted later this week.